Tuesday, October 27, 2009

A House

I live in a large house-
with three other female individuals-
one (Alecia) is the organized worker-
she is specifically anal-
and does not think like I do and can be very mean.
There is the straight forward learning one (Gena) who is more lazed
and kind of confused and less emotional than that of-
my felow Sagittarius housemate Liz-
who is much more emotional and experienced yet is very sad deeply
she has a very true glow inside of her, and I have befriended her quite well.
I have moved to the city of Pittsburgh.
A place I have revolved my mind around quite a bit- in the past.
Now I am here.
I feel very different here- all entangled in different peoples emotions.
I am deeply in love- that is what brought me here.
I am poor- I am less productive and I am swaying.
A young beautiful girl with so much to learn- my sweet Emily.
A deep confusion resides in her I feel stemming from the separartion of her beautiful parents and her past. A sort of resentment that is boiling in her 16 year old brain.
Emily's beauty rivals that of the calm after a storm when light forces its entrance through the clouds and through distant rains to create a rainbow overlooking a field of flowers in the summer.
My wish is for her to be happy. I want to be happy too- I wish I knew better what I need to do or even better to motivate myself to do now what I know I need to do.
I need to send my life outwards into this world so I don't rot.
Existence is just there- it jumps out at you sometimes- and you get scared.
There are so many restrictions on "living" once you get past how hard it is to deal with existence. And then there are other lives.
Is there something wrong with "I"?

ser⋅pent  /ˈsɜrpənt/ –noun
1. a snake.
2. a wily, treacherous, or malicious person.
3. the Devil; Satan. Gen. 3:1–5.
4. a firework that burns with serpentine motion or flame.
5. an obsolete wooden wind instrument with a serpentine shape and a deep, coarse tone. Compare ophicleide.
6. (initial capital letter) Astronomy. the constellation Serpens.


1250–1300; ME (< MF) < L serpent-, s. of serpēns; see Serpens

e⋅go  /ˈigoʊ, ˈɛgoʊ/ –noun, plural e⋅gos.
1. the “I” or self of any person; a person as thinking, feeling, and willing, and distinguishing itself from the selves of others and from objects of its thought.
2. Psychoanalysis. the part of the psychic apparatus that experiences and reacts to the outside world and thus mediates between the primitive drives of the id and the demands of the social and physical environment.
3. egotism; conceit; self-importance: Her ego becomes more unbearable each day.
4. self-esteem or self-image; feelings: Your criticism wounded his ego.
5. (often initial capital letter) Philosophy. a. the enduring and conscious element that knows experience.
b. Scholasticism. the complete person comprising both body and soul.

6. Ethnology. a person who serves as the central reference point in the study of organizational and kinship relationships.


1780–90; < L: I; psychoanalytic term is trans. of G (das) Ich (the) I