Friday, July 17, 2009

my brain right now

What am I missing-
what don't I have-
why am I worried-
why am I afraid-
Should I be-
Who is this person-
is this a competition now-
I'm scared-
I'm alone now and am thinking an awful lot and have been even in my half sleep going to bed and in waking up-
i'm not there to know-
what do I have? is it solid and real-
I think so, but i'm not there-
I went walking last night lagging behind the group-
in the same country i've been stuck in for my life-
always stuck-
smoking a bunch-
should I even question-
am I just paranoid-
no, it's completely understandable-
no, it's not
what is this bullshit- life is so fucking hard-
how will I do this or that or this-
am I even worth the struggle
wouldn't it be nice to know-
do I even care or should I?